User blog:LordXcano/Birthday Fun Fun Fun Fun Fun Fun Fun Fun
So I'm celebrating my birthday tomorrow (although its actually on Monday...) so yeah. Since age is arbitary anyway I guess that makes me 16 tomorrow? It's the celebration and physiological development that counts and 3 days isn't gonna push me through puberty all that much. So anyways I'm basically just gonna summarize my life as best I can. It'll be done by grade because I can remember stuff better that way than I can with years. Grade 0 *I was born. They needed to use a suction type thing which is what gave me these fantastic lips *I tried to watch 9/11 on TV at the age of 1 but my parents thought it was too violent *I ate a whole spider Pre-K *I cried about going to the first day of school, I am still traumatized *I slept next to a teacher because there was always a nap time and I wanted to be alone in the corner *This one chick bit some guy's hand and the teacher told him to bite her back and he never did but I wanted to *Someone called another kid a "worm" and got in trouble for name-calling Kindergarten *There were always two lines formed after lunch and I accidentally went into the wrong one and ended up staying in a different class the whole day *I got in trouble for not having any info on a kid who broke the rules, this is when my spirit was shattered and I learned the world was unjust 1st Grade *This one thirsty girl would always drop her milk so I could pick it up for her *I learned what porn was and I thought pee fetishes were the hip thing for a while *I moved to North Carolina and froze to death 2nd Grade *I fought a kid *Met this new friend, Ashley, who I was really thirsty for *Teacher had us read in circles but I was an edgelord so I'd always stay slightly outside of the circle 3rd Grade *I was homeschooled *My dad messed with a lot of my grades by going over the work with me *I did eventually learn my multiplication tables by spinning around a lot and reciting them *I still had no idea how the mechanics behind multiplication worked 4th Grade *Got to see Ashley again, she had a new friend, Kayley, who I was also thirsty for *I proposed to Kayley by saying IKOLY (I kind of like you) and then hid in shame for the next 8 years *They talked about it a lot and it made me uncomfortable *My mom found out and teased me for it and now I don't share any info about my social life with them 5th Grade *I tried to get a kid to hold his tongue and say "hockey puck" for the obvious reason of them saying "fuck" but my mom found out and I cried *Met a new friend, Alex, who I really liked being around but not vice versa *This kid named Jesse introduced me to evolution and I called him a Satanist *Alex abandoned me and I cried *I left the school and I cried 6th Grade *I went to a public middle school where you had to walk 500 miles to get to the nearest class *I was heavily bullied and I can see why *My meme game was trash *I became slightly more accepting of evolution, but I had it completely wrong. I assumed that a giraffe that stretched its neck would have a child naturally predisposed to having a long neck, this is not the case *Some kids cut me with silverware *I transferred schools to Bethany 7th Grade *Met this girl Olivia and I was really really thirsty for her *My chat messages with Olivia were basically every "guy can't see she's not interested" cringe post ever *My Social Studies teacher was a conspiracy theorist and also didn't understand that meme videos aren't supposed to be "good" 8th Grade *My next Social Studies teacher believed Nixon was responsible for JFK *My Math teacher was a veteran of Vietnam and he was very cool, he taught me to cover my mouth when yawning *I began my habit of wearing a jacket all day every day *I started using Tumblr *Began using Miiverse towards the end of this period 9th Grade *I met this guy, Kyle, he was cool and we dated but we broke up because I was an ass *Kyle indirectly motivated me to switch from a transphobic political view to a more liberal one *I became atheistic around this time *I joined Scarf Heroes *Avery became my new friend, she is still cool and obsessed with shitty bands *I met my "only real friends" because mom doesn't understand me 10th Grade *I changed schools once again because I left for Florida *I became very stressed all the time, far more so than when in 9th Grade *My grades got lower each semester, but they are picking up now *All of my friends are nerds and people intimidate me a lot That's basically everything I remember that I am willing to share. I guess. Should serve as a reminder in case I forget like everything. EDIT: Oh uh you can ask stuff in the comments too if you'd like because I'm much more open to sharing information if people ask for it Category:Blog posts